Blending families after a divorce is difficult for everyone. Step-parents have to get comfortable with stepchildren who they’ve only met recently, and family bonding isn’t ever quick and easy. However, by putting the effort into forming lasting relationships and using strategies to help the blended family get comfortable, the process can be made much easier. Here are 3 strategies to ease along the transition of blending families:
1. Focus on Individual Relationships
It’s tempting to try and force “family bonding” activities that include every member of the blended family, but the best way to ease the transition is to focus on individual relationships. This is especially true of the relationship between stepparents and their stepchildren; since they haven’t known stepchildren all their lives like the biological parent, stepparents need to work to build trust with their stepchildren and learn to love them for who they are.
2. Find Common Interests and Activities
If you want family bonding to be successful, you’ll need to find activities that the whole family, or at least stepparents and their stepchildren, can enjoy. If possible, find activities that everyone enjoys and has some experience with, such as swimming or tennis, or watch a television show that everyone is into. Or you might all agree to try something new together, whether it be taking up a new sport or learning a difficult game. You should also find common interests shared by step-parents and their new stepchildren. Encourage the children to participate in activities with their new parent and as a whole family.
3. Clear Up Divorce Issues as Quickly as Possible
This goes for both legal proceedings as well as personal arguments between you and your former spouse. For children, fighting between divorced parents can be stressful and make them feel split loyalties, and it’s much easier to move on if all the divorce paperwork is finalized. If you need help finishing divorce proceedings, contact professional divorce attorneys like DiPietro Family Law Group.
By focusing on building relationships both between your new stepchildren as well as the entire family, the process of blending families can be made easier. When in doubt, look for common interests, and be understanding and respectful of the way the divorce impacts your children. Most importantly, if you’re feeling overwhelmed, take some time off to relax; blending families is stressful, but important, work.
